I had a rather difficult audition for a Student Film this past Monday. I applied through a posting on Casting workbook. I got the sides and prepared what I wanted to do for the audition. There were no lines for my part, so I gave myself some actions to do while the other character’s lines were read over top. When I arrived at the audition, I was asked if I had prepared a monologue. I had not. So they began to leaf through A Midsummer Night’s Dream looking for a passage for me to read. Knowing how horrible reading can look on camera, I offered to do a short part of a Helena monologue that I have worked on from that play. I had totally not prepared it for that day, I hadn’t taken the time to properly refresh the lines, and I had real trouble dropping emotionally into the role at that blink of an eye, but I did my best. I performed an abridged Shakespearean monologue without ever mapping it for the camera. I hope it went over well. I asked the director if she wanted me to perform what I would do in the scene, and she said that there was no need, and that they were just looking for a presence, but that I “blew it out of the water”. I’m not sure how to take that, I’m reading into it any and every way possible and making myself sick with paranoia. I guess my lesson is just to be prepared for absolutely anything every time. Brush up on monologues from time to time to keep them fresh, and take enough time before auditions to do a proper warm up, just in case…

Wow, I hope I didn’t burn a bridge with that performance. I can only hope that I am my own worst critic.